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Spring Is Coming!

Sometimes on a dark, damp day in the middle of winter, I think about how wonderful it would be to live on a tropical island where you’d never have to face the doom and gloom of a west coast winter.

Even in other, colder Canadian cities, they seem to get more sunshine than we do. We just get a lot of grey and rain. And more grey. And more rain. This is why many of us refer to it as the “wetcoast”.

For people who move here from other parts of the world, the hardest thing to adjust to is the grey. And the rain. It’s depressing.

That’s why I like to imagine waking up to summer every morning, and living in shorts and t-shirts all year in a perpetual paradise.

But then again, if we didn’t have winter, I’d miss one of my favourite seasons: spring.

Spring means so many wonderful things: new life, new hope, a fresh start. It gets just a little warmer every day as spring approaches. The bees start to wake up, the birds begin to nest, and the air is fresh with new scents and warm feelings. It’s literally like coming alive.

When I was little, my mother used to note the date of the first crocus on our wall calendar every year. “Oh! It’s a day earlier this year!” She’d smile. And then she’d note the first daffodil and the first tulip.

On one of my walks the other day, I was so happy to see a bunch of little yellow crocuses blooming that I took a picture of it. A block or so later I bumped into someone I knew who said she had just sent a series of spring flower pictures to her relatives back east.

We “wet-coasters” love to do that, don’t we? Torture our friends and family back east with flower pictures, boasting of our early spring. We even have an official flower count here on the island, and we love to let the rest of the country know every daffodil-ic detail. Just to rub it in. This year the Greater Victoria Flower Count runs from March 9th to March 16th.

Most of us on the island know about it, but if you’ve never heard of or participated in the flower count, well, it’s exactly what it sounds like. You go outside and count flowers and then you send your numbers in. There were 65+ billion blooms counted last year. On their website, they even have a count down to the flower count.

It feels like a count down to spring, really. When I last looked, there were 29 days, 22 hours, 7 minutes and 53 seconds to go. Sigh.

Of course, real spring starts on March 20th, but sometimes it does show up a little early just to tease us. It can even show up for a few days in February sometimes. Our last couple of weeks have shown us a few lovely sunsets and sunnier days.

But then, all of a sudden, snow can rear its chilly head too…

I don’t know about you, but I need spring really badly this year. Like many out there, my family have experienced some great losses over the past few months, on top of all of the negative news that’s happening in the world right now.

And what with more and more people coming down with COVID, it has been like living in a bad dream. I now know many people who’ve been infected with COVID since the Omicron variant has taken over. Sadly, I even know one person who has died from it. It’s been another very cruel winter.

So how about it spring? Why not show up a little earlier this year just to perk us up a bit? Bring on the daffodils and tulips, the nests full of tiny chirpers, the sun and the new buds. Let’s get back to golf and picnics and…spring cleaning?

Okay, wait…

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Never Mind Astro, I Want Rosey

I couldn’t believe it was actually going to happen. Rosey the Robot was finally coming to life.

If you’re old enough, you’ll remember the old cartoon series “The Jetsons”. There was George and Jane Jetson and their children Elroy and Judy, and one of my favourite characters on the series, Rosey, their personal robot maid.

I loved Rosey. She was like a sassy, no-nonsense aunt. “Beep! Beep! I may be homely, buster, but I am s-m-a-r-t, smart! Beep! Beep!” She didn’t take any baloney from anyone. But boy, could she clean their space house!

I always wanted a Rosey of my own. Who wouldn’t?

So when Amazon announced their new home robot Astro, I was beside myself with excitement. Finally! My own personal housecleaner.

I was imagining all of the things I would never have to do again. Scrub the toilet. Wash the kitchen floor. Dust and vacuum. Maybe Astro would even make my bed and prepare my favourite dinner. Wow.

I decided to watch Amazon’s introductory video, announcing Astro.

“What are we going to do with a robot?” the lady in the video asks her husband. Are you kidding me? I said that out loud. Housecleaning as we know it is now over!

“Astro, follow me,” the husband says.

I watched with great anticipation. Was he going to give Astro a toilet brush and put him right to work?

Astro followed him. Okay, so you can command him to follow you. Sort of like a dog.

That lead to another scene with a little girl talking to her grandmother through Astro’s video screen face.

I started wondering if the exciting stuff was still to come.

In yet another scene, a guy sitting on a park bench used his phone to give Astro the command to check and make sure that he turned the stove off at home.

Astro can relay text messages, re-charge itself, check the house for intruders, and play and dance to music. So basically a video camera that moves. And can catch a raccoon stealing your cupcakes.

At the very end, Astro brings the woman a beer on its tiny platter, and she declares “Alright, I’m in!”

Well, I’m not.

I already have a video doorbell. I can video chat with anyone I want using my phone or my tablet. And if I’ve accidently left the stove on, the fire department will surely let me know. As they’re dousing the flames.

I also have a man servant to bring me my wine. Begrudgingly, perhaps, but he’ll do it if I ask nicely.

I want a robot that can do the real work!

Who created Astro anyway? Let’s see. It can follow you like your dog, re-charge itself and bring you a beer. Was it a MAN?

Something I saw recently was an extract from a 1950s home economics book called “Tips To Look After Your Husband”. It’s filled with eye rolling suggestions for wives, like having dinner ready when he gets home. Preparing yourself and your children so you are presentable to him. Clearing away the clutter.

At the end of the article, it says “Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.” Cue another eye roll.

I have an idea. Let’s change that to “Your home robot will make your house a place of peace and order when you can renew yourself in body and spirit”. And instead of Astro, we’ll call our robot Rosey.

Alright, I’m in!